May 13, 2010

Mother’s Day this year involved a family gathering with my siblings and their families, anyone who was able to make it on short notice. We gathered for a pot luck dinner at my sister’s home, in consideration of our mother whose sister is dying of cancer. We were still able to celebrate our relationship and appreciation of our mother without having her feel that she had to make dinner or be “at home” to family members who  show up during the day. It was a short jaunt for my parents to come, and they enjoyed the gathering.

Each of my daughters made their appreciation known in some way or other that day. One arrived at our home before the family gathering, bearing an attractive card with a sentimental message, along with the beautiful Hibiscus plant shown in the photo. The second presented me with card of best wishes and a promise to celebrate later, since her life is rather full at the moment. I will look forward to this later celebration. The third brought a handmade card with a touching personal message and small package containing a necklace made by a woman in Kenya.

For all the cards available for puchase on such an occasion, I have sometimes found it difficult to find the right card, one that balances sentimentality with truth and dignity, one that recognizes individual traits that few card shop items can duplicate. Having often chosen a simple card, and adding a hand-written message, I appreciate both the cards selected and messages that are hand written.

I am human, and not perfect, as mothers go. I have struggled in my role many times, trying to balance it with my own needs and that of my husband and extended family or friends. In conversation with other mothers, I know I am not alone. Receiving these beautiful cards, Hallmark or otherwise,  is heartening.  To read and reread those cards from my grown-up daughters is satisfying.

And so to other mothers, I wish you the joy of knowing the same thing—that your children love  and appreciate you for who you are.